My name is Michelle and I was diagnosed with epilepsy 11 years ago. My seizures didn’t start until adulthood. I have a lesion on my left frontal lobe which my doctor says is a birth defect. I don’t work, I don’t drive and my seizures are not controlled. Those are the basic details. I’ve shared detailed history of my journey with epilepsy on my blog (www.fitepileptic.com) but I don’t really share that much about it anymore, a recent decision. Not because I am embarrassed to say I have epilepsy and certainly not because I care what people think of me and my condition. I don’t share much because my focus is to rise above it and not dwell on it.
I made the decision to focus on rising above because during the first 8 years of life with epilepsy I handled it well and moved forward. I had accepted my condition and that was that. The last couple of years I have shared and I have talked with others about epilepsy. Sadly I found that for me all this talk brought on a negative side. Talking about epilepsy with others and blogging about it, I just ended up feeling down and annoyed. Talking about doctor’s appointments, frustrations, medications, feeling tired, seizures, etc. – I began two feel like I was becoming a “poor me” person. Talking and sharing doesn’t work for me. Please don’t misunderstand, I do realize that epilepsy is a serious condition but FOR ME, I’ve always felt that things could be worse. Those of us with epilepsy suffer in different ways. Each of us has to do what is best for us individually. I don’t think there is a right or wrong answer. Sharing/talking about epilepsy is a big downer for me.
I mentioned that I have blogged about epilepsy but I only did because I started a blog about weight loss. I brought epilepsy up because it’s a part of my life. Epilepsy and weight issues both equally affect me. I still blog but not often and when I do it’s mostly about weight loss. I just don’t feel like I have anything to share. My choice has been to show that I can rise above this condition. I don’t hide the fact that I have epilepsy and I feel that when I live an active and happy life, I’m showing I can rise above.